Sometimes, do things you don’t want to be great at.
The world is full of explicit and implicit messaging about excellence. It manifests in the way we talk about outliers – whether performers, creators, inventors, businesspeople, collectors – as aspirational. If you are a good cook, the thinking goes, you should aspire to be a Michelin chef. If you’re a penny collector, you should aspire to have a one-of-a-kind collection. If you’re a singer, you should aspire to be Beyoncé or Ella. And (it’s implied) if you can’t be those things, maybe you should aim elsewhere.
I love being a pretty good baker. I don’t care to be a remarkable one. I love being a pretty good singer, too. I love having pretty good singers in my ensembles – people with full lives who love to sing. They’re there because they love it, and will do their best.
There must be room in the world for pretty good. And I’m more content in life being content with pretty good. I have a few aspirations in my life where I aim for outstanding, and for the rest, I’m pretty good with pretty good.
(P.S. This explicit message will help you keep more people in your choir, in your band. The implication that pretty good is not acceptable is a great reason for kids to quit.)