Assumption of Positive Intent is hard to practice. It’s easy to assume malicious intent – that people are out to get you, or don’t have your best interests at heart, or just don’t care enough about what you care about.
In Dr. Brené Brown’s Dare To Lead, she writes, “Daring leaders work from the assumption that people are doing the best they can.” She goes on to say that we cannot make that assumption when we come from armored leadership rather than daring leadership.
In my own practice, it helps to slow down and consider the situation. Slooooooowly.
Rather than fire off a reply to that email that’s gotten me riled up, I ask if the way I read it is the way it was meant. Rather than argue back in a heated conversation, I leave space, speak gently, and think slowly. I literally say “generous assumptions” in my head.
Over time, it’s gotten easier to make assumptions of positive intent the norm – because it’s a well-worn path. It makes my interactions with others – whether a boss, a peer, a friend, or a student – easier to manage and more consistently pleasant and productive in outcome.
It’s not easy but it’s so worthwhile to practice.